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May 13, 2021

Although there are copious amounts of information available, discussing mental health can still feel taboo. This can present a barrier when it comes to supporting a friend or a family member living with mental illness. However, with the right tools, we can all be more prepared to support someone we care about, as family and friends are often the first lines of defense in managing a mental illness.

How do I know if someone is experiencing a mental health problem?

Not all mental illnesses are obvious – so there is no simple way of identifying whether a person is mentally ill or not. However, if there is a possibility that someone is experiencing a mental health issue, it’s best to approach the situation sensitively until you learn more information. While mental health conditions all have their own set of symptoms, the National Alliance on Mental Health lists some of the following as common signs of mental illness:

• Excessive worrying or fear
• Feeling excessively sad or low
• Extreme mood changes, including uncontrollable “highs” or feelings of euphoria
• Avoiding friends and social activities
• Difficulties understanding or relating to other people
• Difficulty perceiving reality (delusions or hallucinations, in which a person experiences and senses things that don't exist in objective reality)
• Inability to perceive changes in one’s own feelings, behavior, or personality
• Overuse of substances like alcohol or drugs
• Contemplating suicide
• Inability to carry out daily activities or handle daily problems and stress

How do I help?

It’s natural to want to help someone you are worried about, however it can be difficult to know what to do in situations like this. It’s important that you reach out to the person you are worried about once you are aware there is an issue. Due to many stigmas surrounding mental health, it can be especially hard for someone to initiate a conversation about what they are experiencing.

How to Talk About Mental Health

If you need help starting a conversation about mental health, MentalHealth.gov suggests leading with open-ended questions. As your friend/family member speaks, ensure you are actively listening to understand rather than respond. Use some of the questions below to start a conversation:

• I've been worried about you. Can we talk about what you are experiencing? If not, who are you comfortable talking to?
• I am someone who cares and wants to listen. What do you want me to know about how you are feeling?
• Sometimes talking to someone who has dealt with a similar experience helps. Do you know of others who have experienced these types of problems with who you can talk?
• It seems like you are going through a difficult time. How can I help you to find help?

Things to avoid saying:
• “Just pray about it.”
• “It’ll work itself out.”
• “We all feel a little crazy every once in a while.”
• “Just stop thinking about it.”

Things to avoid doing:
• Being hostile toward the person
• Seeming disinterested in the conversation
• Making jokes about their situation
• Criticizing blaming or raising your voice at them

Where do I get professional help for my friend/family member?

It’s important to know your limits when trying to help a friend/family member who has mental health problems. If their issues become serious or you believe they are in immediate danger, it’s important not to wait to get them help.

If you or someone you know is in danger of harming themselves, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or Live Online Chat.

If the situation is potentially life-threatening, call 911.

If you think your friend/family member would benefit from therapy or counseling, you can refer them to a counselor you know of. Catholic Charities provides low-cost therapeutic counseling in both Knoxville and Chattanooga, as well as telehealth to all individuals in Tennessee. Learn more about our program here.

If a mental illness has affected your friend/family member’s ability to keep stable housing or they are on the verge of homelessness/are homeless – you can refer them to Horizon House. Our Horizon House 1 & 2, and Five Rivers campuses provide community supportive housing for individuals living with chronic mental illness. Last year, our community supportive housing provided more than 8,550 days of shelter.

Supporting Someone With A Mental Health Condition

Although there are copious amounts of information available, discussing mental health can still feel taboo. This can present a barrier when it comes to supporting a friend or a family member living with mental illness. However, with the right tools, we can all be more prepared to support someone we care about, as family and friends are often the first lines of defense in managing a mental illness.

How do I know if someone is experiencing a mental health problem?
Not all mental illnesses are obvious – so there is no simple way of identifying whether a person is mentally ill or not. However, if there is a possibility that someone is experiencing a mental health issue, it’s best to approach the situation sensitively until you learn more information. 

Where do I get professional help for my friend/family member?
It’s important to know your limits when trying to help a friend/family member who has mental health problems. If their issues become serious or you believe they are in immediate danger, it’s important not to wait to get them help.

If you or someone you know is in danger of harming themselves, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or Live Online Chat.

If the situation is potentially life-threatening, call 911.

If you think your friend/family member would benefit from therapy or counseling, you can refer them to a counselor you know of. Catholic Charities provides low-cost therapeutic counseling in both Knoxville and Chattanooga, as well as telehealth to all individuals in Tennessee. Learn more about our program here.

If a mental illness has affected your friend/family member’s ability to keep stable housing or they are on the verge of homelessness/are homeless – you can refer them to Horizon House. Our Horizon House 1 & 2, and Five Rivers campuses provide community supportive housing for individuals living with chronic mental illness. Last year, our community supportive housing provided more than 8,550 days of shelter.

For more resources, direct your friend/family member to visit the National Alliance on Mental Illness or contact the NAMI HelpLine below.

While mental health conditions all have their own set of symptoms, the National Alliance on Mental Health lists some of the following as common signs of mental illness:
                    • Excessive worrying or fear
                    • Feeling excessively sad or low
                    • Extreme mood changes, including uncontrollable “highs” or feelings of euphoria
                    • Avoiding friends and social activities
                    • Difficulties understanding or relating to other people
                    • Difficulty perceiving reality (delusions or hallucinations, in which a person experiences and senses things that don't exist
                        in objective reality)
                    • Inability to perceive changes in one’s own feelings, behavior, or personality
                    • Overuse of substances like alcohol or drugs
                    • Contemplating suicide
                    • Inability to carry out daily activities or handle daily problems and stress

Use some of the questions below to start a conversation:
                    • I've been worried about you. Can we talk about what you are experiencing? If not, who are you comfortable talking to?
                    • I am someone who cares and wants to listen. What do you want me to know about how you are feeling?
                    • Sometimes talking to someone who has dealt with a similar experience helps. Do you know of others who have
                         experienced these types of problems with who you can talk?
                    • It seems like you are going through a difficult time. How can I help you to find help?

                                             Things to avoid saying:
                              • “Just pray about it.”
                              • “It’ll work itself out.”
                              • “We all feel a little crazy every once in a while.”
                              • “Just stop thinking about it.”

How do I help? 
It’s natural to want to help someone you are worried about, however it can be difficult to know what to do in situations like this. It’s important that you reach out to the person you are worried about once you are aware there is an issue. Due to many stigmas surrounding mental health, it can be especially hard for someone to initiate a conversation about what they are experiencing.

How to Talk About Mental Health
If you need help starting a conversation about mental health, MentalHealth.gov suggests leading with open-ended questions. As your friend/family member speaks, ensure you are actively listening to understand rather than respond.

                                     Things to avoid doing:
                    • Being hostile toward the person
                    • Seeming disinterested in the conversation
                    • Making jokes about their situation
                    • Criticizing blaming or raising your voice at them

Other Ways to Help

Where do I get professional help for my friend/family member?
It’s important to know your limits when trying to help a friend/family member who has mental health problems. If their issues become serious or you believe they are in immediate danger, it’s important not to wait to get them help.

If you or someone you know is in danger of harming themselves, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or Live Online Chat.

If the situation is potentially life-threatening, call 911.